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[May 27th 2006] |
I hate the way you talk to me,
and the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car,
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
and the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick,
it even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you're always right,
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh,
even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around,
and the fact that you didnt call.
But mostly I hate the way I dont hate you,
not even close
not even a little bit
not even at all.
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| bye |
[April 20th 2006] |
The Day Before You - Rascal Flatts
I had all but given up on finding
The one that I could fall into
On the day before you
I was ready settled for
Less than love and not much more
There was no such thing as a dream come true
Oh, but that was all the day before you
Now you're here and everything changes
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I would never have to go back to
The day before you
In your eyes I see forever
Makes me wish that my life never knew
The day before you
The Heaven knows those years without you
Shaping my heart for the day that I found you
You're the reason for all that I've been through
Then I'm thankful for the day before you
Now you're here and everything changes
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I would never have to go back to
The day before you
--
ok i end off with a lovely song..
don't want to blog already la.
nothing much to blog and it feels lonely.
ok maybe there's a lot to write about everyday but then like faith said
i'll remember all the lovely important things myself anyway right..
so no need to visit and see the same old entry already ok?
bye
=)
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[April 14th 2006] |
It always rains on good friday.
am in a real holiday mood even though cts are long past..
went tampines mall for lunch w family just now. saw this pretty and v attitude girl. wah. coolness. haha..
poisonwood bible and heart of darkness really complement each other. sometimes the situations and images mix themselves up in my head and its hard to take them apart.
not bad.. like the lit books have quite good links with the lit S books.. like oranges are not the only fruit with woman warrior.
anw i am going to try finish reading heart of darkness today!
get into the mugging groove. >p
go listen to Casting Crowns - Who Am I
nice.
ok and on a very shallow note.. I CANT WAIT FOR EASTER!!
because the fridge has tons and tons of chocolate eggs oo yipee!
--
It wasn't the nails that held Him to the cross
It was love.
right. bye!
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[April 11th 2006] |
I realised one thing about me that has changed quite significantly this year..
is that i have stopped looking for the meaning behind every little thing.
really!
last time i used to think and think about how some thing/action/word may have a greater meaning..
this year somehow.. i just stopped doing that.
ahah it's like if something happens then oh ok loh! v gd.
haha..
and life is a loooot simpler
and happier =)
good job elissa!
--
quite a decent day in sch.. gp was v v funny i think pek is classic and CC has a v lag laugh ahahah..
aft sch had fried rice and then writing zits testi
blahblah then took a very stressful ride back!
oh but i discovered a nice old song today.. its pretty =)
ok bye!
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[April 8th 2006] |
gosh today was such a horrible waste of time..
and its my last ora and all i did was rot it away at fort canning hill!!
morning turned up late for the meeting then walked ard with some ppl and got my finger pricked..
actually the prick itself was fine
but oh maan i was squirming and squirming when i felt my finger smearing MY OWN warm wet blood on the paper. gross.
then left later on for fort canning. i went about my pollinating business again.. conitnued from the sec 3 heritage tree trail where me and zit were stationed at EXACTLY the same spot.. what are the chances maaaan. and we had nothing to do for hours so yes i did what i do best at fort canning
tada
yea we had about 5 teams.. the rest of the time i read poisonwood bible and made very small talk with the others at the station.. then i took a few nice long walks on the trails by myself..its pretty after it rains.
left the place at abt 3 cabbed back w s.enthil k.angya and i.lman.
reached back and the school was in a state of post-party and closure so it was relatively empty, stalls were packing up and i realised i knew no one! so the councillors went to bunch together and ok i guess i knew some people there and they did come talk to me but i jus wasnt in the mood to laugh loudly and talk about my usual dumb things.
and the weather was a dreary dampener so i loitered around calling up everybody i could think of..
and my dear friends WHY DIDNT YOU ALL PICK UP!!! =(
so i was in an even greater state of misery because seriously try being and feeling alone after ORA.. hai.
then there was this 5 year old boy kicking his balloon around near the stalls area. so i watched him for a while then after that i joined him in kicking.
i said: "eh boyboy kick here.."
and he looked a bit doubtful initially cos i was wearing a skirt.
then he kicked it over and so we started kicking the balloon to each other..
ahahah epitome of sadness man.
but i think he was quite happy to have a kicking partner.. but after a while i thought if i kicked the balloon anymore i might just burst it.. so i waved bye to the kid.
then later i realised there were still some ppl at bone marrow room! some friends finally! then found daryl and navjote!! but they wanted to go try haunted house and i was broke already.. so in the end i decided to just go home.
was still feeling miserable up till then. then was about to walk out when i met chicken little who walked me to mrt =)
so i actually started chattering and recounting the whole boring day and after that all the misery got neutralised haha =)
OH GOSH WAIT WAIT
I FORGOT TO SAY!!
in the morning i was rushing to find someone then suddenly I SAW MRS BALA!!!! AAHHH!!! dear dear mrs bala =) =)
then i was so excited to see her and she looked the same and her curls were bobbing up and down even more than usual when she came over to talk to me then i couldnt stop grinning and she was beaming also hahaha.. i miss her <3
and saw some other rgs teachers mr tan mrs a.nis and mrs a.lina wee.. who all waved happily =)
yea i think i will want to go down for more ORAs.. this crappy one shall not be my last!
k bye!
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| Happy Birthday Faith! |
[April 2nd 2006] |
hellooo!
yesterday was a v nice day =)
woke up late on a saturday morning and took the train to school to meet my fellow rockclimbers.. we are beginning to get more and more used to this whole thing and the nervousness kind of wore off already [which can be seen from how we were all late except for tao].
the j1s were not bad i like their attitude! got a lot of really nice cooperative and very very helpful people in their batch.
after we dismissed them the j2s had our own climbing session with the teachers and they kind of tested our abseil systems.. cos we had to construct abseil systems from the top of the wall to launch off the j1s next week.. and a few glitches at first but after a while everything was fine
then they tested each of our lead-climb, anchor set ups and anchor retrievals and for the first time i was feeling v no pressure at all! ahah did the whole climb smoothly and the anchor set up was fine jus tt the stupid D-ring on the wall was slanted in a way the carabiner couldnt go through it at all and the new instructor who came down was trying to ram it in for me but he couldnt also and he ended up shaving off some of the metal on the carabiner O.O wah v strong..
so in the end we modified it a bit and everything else flowed smoothly yayy!!
after the whole thing it was about 7.30 already and then we werE DAMN HIGH!!! ahaha.. when me and shuting were supposed to go ahead and flag a cab and after a while we realised we were running like lunatics to the road and then behind tao and ye went nuts also ahaha v fun =)
reached school then i changed and rushed out to get a cab and went to town for faith's bday dinner!!!!
actually i wasnt v hungry but i was v greedy and ate up a lot of food heh sorry guys..
had a splendid dinner and we took a lot of photos..
cihan v prettyy haha.. and i like the second picture we all look v tall!!
and faith had a loooot of presents
haha so cute ah!
then after tt we went walking down orchard road and some ppl had to go off and then tsai faith and i got ice cream and drinks frm orange julius and walked to mrt..
v nice catching up =)
faith's bday unites people!
reached home went online for an insy while to find out tt stupid e.lgin had pranked me cos he said he had something very very urgent and i had to call him immediately but i was bathing so i went online and said sorry sorry but then he said fake one la -_-
ok!!!
lovely dayys =)
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[April 1st 2006] |
I CANT SLEEP
i don't even talk to people i meeeet
i feel sad when you're sad
i feel glad when you're glad
if you only knew
what im gg through
i just cant smi-ile without yooouuu
kk actually the point of tt is tt I CANT SLEEP LA cos i slept for an hour when i came home and now v awake and im v hungry and i just checked i realised i ate up the last of the waffles yesterday =(
you came along
just like a song
you brightened my daayy
who'd believe you were
part of a dream
that only seemed lightyears awaaaaaayyy
ahh! now the song is stuck in my head..
its been quite a long and tiresome daayy blarelajlfkaflkjl and meet zit go town then weather was so gloomy and the sky was damn black
then come home felt soo tired and quite sick of life then just went to sleep ahah
but nvm alls well that ends well =)
OMG ITS APRIL FOOLS
wah laoo
so boring when theres no sch
--
i think there's so much to think about. and really its not just about the one thing which i always say it is..
there are things that im too afraid to go and dig into, and too scared to question. its easy to just let it be like that from now until probably forever. i think there will always be moments when i say what if i had done something just a little bit differently, or was not that scared, or for a while i could let go of my pride and rationality.
haha but i guess its jus who i am loh.. always gotta be in control cannot let something slip out that has any relation to anything..
and so ironic im doing that right now while saying all this haha
i hope i dont ever regret it. i probably wont, and i can still be Happy in so many other ways =)
OKAY
finish!
now i think im a bit sleepy..
gg to sleep..
NIIIGHT
[zit blog lar]
---
ahaha its now 1.51 am
and im talking to faith abt pickup lines and weirdboy
heehee ok la today ended off v well =)
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[March 30th 2006] |
today was not bad.. had a lot of laughs througout the day!!
reccess was v funny cos of the zit dares i think she really got no sense of shame man.
then had a really inspiring lit S session i think mcc is so POWERFUL!!! whoa..
and then finally me and trix were laughing at a very helpless yee ler wahh it was damn hilarious we were stil laughing abt it on the way back.. wondering if i should put up pictures but there's a lot at stake. haha maybe on class blog later la..
kk..
[anw fine.. obviously the mind over matter thing is not really working yet.. uhh. AIYA DUNNO WHAT TO DO LA.. it'll turn out fine somehow.]
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[March 28th 2006] |
豆浆离不开油条
让我爱你爱到老
wah chinese ah!!
haha those two lines have been playing in my head the whoooole day..
began well with frost essay and bombed with int hist.. aiya sigh
i expected that after the paper actually but the thing is everyone else told me they'd bomb with me! evidently not...
this is one of those times i feel incurably stupid.
and it wasnt so much the paper but just that i wondered howcome when other ppl dont study a lot but they still can do well but i cant i must be stupid! and i was crumbling inside and zit called after hist to get me to rush down to hc.. then i was still in the midst of crumbling then i talked to gerald who saved me from actually crying like a nut while running to the 157 bustop.
and it doesnt mean that lit is anything to cheer about also because i thought frost was the best of all the lit essays which means i just hope the others dont pull this one down by too much.. grr for once i wish this had a very very high weightage.
i almost regret not studying for cts.. just almost. haha because i'm thinking of how things happened and i guess its not worth sacrificing some of that just for one or two up-grades i wont remember years later.
ok all that crap aside..
TODAY IS CIHAN'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!
omg i can't say how glad i am to have gone down..
at first after history i just wanted to look for gerald and mope but zit and faith were telling me to chiong down and gerald had chem S so ok in the end i went although i was feeling damn shaky inside..
then got to the bustop the bus was taking too long and i saw some ppl i knew walking to the bustop and i was really in no mood to talk to them because any moment i would have just burst i think. then i got a cab.. and the taxi driver was v nice haha he talked to me the whole way and i dindt have much time to think...
finally reached hc then zit fetched me and i saw GINA!!! then i saw CIHAN!!!!! after so so looongg.. aiya i wish hanyin was there la i havent seen her in ages also =/
gosh really missed them! and then we sang her a damn loud bday song and v weird cos like 4 rj ppl making a lot of noise ahaha but i was really really happy i went in the end.. its like the moment i stepped into hc then my paper kind of felt v far away..
then as usual we did a lot of stupid things zit just has this effect on ppl la -_-
our photos turned out badly but nvm quite funny at the side always can see a mini zit running in
and their fisthtank changed quite drastically! i think i liked the old one better.. where i made a significant contribution to hc by making freeflow for the soccer table.
then we went the humans classroom and looked at their yearbooks at the hotties and i laughed at the crooked jaw guy and we decided to match faith with gin's classmate.
then went to the canteen where we sat around for a while longer and caught up..
wah i really like gg to hc for some weird reason.. it always makes me a lot happier.. haha for some reason everytime i am DAM SICK OF LIFE then i will have to go to hc last year also liddat.. and then i'll get cheered up..
i feel like doing tt weekly! i wanna see gin and cihan and gang more leh
and calling hanyin and yelling at her on the phone ahahah =)
ok i am gg to bathe..
v thankful for my friends today..
thankyou!!!!!!
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[March 27th 2006] |
hellooooo
it's the first day of school after my self declared holiday the past 5 days..
it went pretty well!
got back econs which i didndt screw up tt badly jus the mcq and one of the drq qns.. aiya next time must study more and cannot study on the day before..
anw today uhh i tried to pay attn at first v successful but then like towards the end like in lit piang cannot take it alr.. i start thinking of what im gg to do aft school..
aiya sounds v boring right
BUT IVE BEEN DAMN HAPPY RECENTLY!!! =) =)
i dont really know why..
anw thankyou faith for the pictures =)
made my day! altho i think your spur of the moments are really v extreme but nvm ahaha it turned out well..
supposed to be doing math now.. but later la.
--
anyway.. i am going to again embark on a plan..
it's going to be mind over matter!
=(((
why does it have to be like that?
=(
aiya nvm.. one day it will all turn out fine in God's hands..
He makes all things beautiful in His time...
--
but for now i shall remain happy la k!
school is very good now.. before the sucky papers come back. i dont really want to see history. or lit for that matter..
math im just hoping that i made an improvement [which is very easy given my past grades haha]..
and i need ODAC!!! i mean not the grades.. but my DEAR DEAR ODAAAAAACCC...
kaaayy...
TOMORORW IS CIHAN'S BIRTHDAY =)
yayy another have fun lets go out and play day ahahah k bye!
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[March 24th 2006] |
this whole week has been a blast =)
today went kboxing w jean trix yee ler and huahua and it was damn fun ahaha i'll be back man..
and then we all went to watch yeeler shave his head!!! ya ALL GONE LEH. whoa..
feels so different when you see him..
haha then we ate in mos for a while and got really sleepy and stoned and so i came home and slacked around..
=)
been feeling really good this whole week.. despite it being cts week haha so weird right
but happy la =)
--
yesterday i was thinking about my life and i realised at this point in time i have constants around which is why i'm so happy and stable
like people who i know will be there when i need...
and today i thought about some things and there were small little other possibilities
which may feel different
but there's comfort in familiarity and security in things that are constant..
So.
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| THESE HAPPY DAYS ARE YOURS AND MIIIINE, HAPPY DAAAYS |
[March 23rd 2006] |
ohmygosh!! IT'S SUCH AN AMAZING DAY I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAAAAYYY
you know this week i have been feeling so so happy even though its like CTs week! how weird is that..
on tuesday supposed to be the shittest day of my life cos morning lit, aftn math, night hardcore mugging for history
but i was really VERY VERY HAPPY the whole day
cos saw zit after so long.. then got surprise appearance frm benny in classroom
after math c.heesiong was SO FREAKING FUNNY then i laugh and laugh and laugh at him ahaha omg.. he was sooooo hilarious
then had mini little odac kope z.ikai's hokkien-mee session after maths
then went home with benny! and on the way back in the train laugh at c.heesiong's eat chicken and the plastic string thing until i cried then i continued laughing omg..
haha
and obviously (she's out of my reach, how can i win? she keeps draggin me in and i know i nevaa will be goood enough for heeeerrrrr) yesterday was also very nice!
outing w class and movie!
but TODAY... OH, BEHOLD TODAY
ice-skating was exhilarating and it was really quite empty with a few pro skaters and a few cute little kids falling all about the place making me laugh and lose my balance
then i at first was SO SCARED of moving i was seriously moving in inches.
then after a while got more used to it but i fell on my bum twice haha v unglam somemore.. piang..
and faith did some damn cool pull me along thing and then on the bends she will use the you know turning motion physics theory dunnowhatshit thing then WHOAAAA DAM COOL cos we go so fast then i feel like im almost going to fly off and crash into the wall but then i never!!!! whoohoooo!
ahaha then in the cold we had nice hot cup noodles with egg and watched the pro-skaters skating
then went to skate a few more rounds then finish =D
so we went to town cos we couldnt think of what else to do..
so ate a bit in town then walked in heeren did some mini shopping but got sian of shopping after half an hour or so..
SO!!
we took a bus down to EAST COAST!!!!!!!
wahhH!!! v exciting ahahah
so we got bikes and the guy at the bike shop was damn nice!!
cos at first we took the 5 bucks/hour bike and then we realised there were cheaper bikes so we were abt to take the 4bucks one..
then he said "ok nvm you just pay $4 but you can use the $5 dollar bikes ok?"
and when he took my EZ-link he kept looking frm the card to me and back to the card then he was trying not to laugh then he finally said, "wah so happy in the photo"
then he v nice let us put our stuff in his little storage area and said "oh no problem no problem! go ahead!!"
WAAAHH!!! that type of people you want to go and tell them they're heroes
k then cycling was really super super fun and the pro $5 bike was somehow a lot easier to ride on than others cos go fast over the bumps also the impact get absorbed by the tires or sth
so it was really v good and the wind was blowing past whoa!!
then we kind of went to the end of east coast park and into some cordoned off area leading to pasir ris or sth and omg it was so desolate i think that's where the forest fires were cos the trees were all dead and bare and quiet..
then we went back to east coast park and to the other end where there was this VERY LONG JETTY!
and we were v dumb we couldnt decide which bench to sit so we kept circling the area and pointing to empty seats and ppl started looking at us circling on the bikes in the little mini space i think we looked v v vv dumb ahah
then we took a lot of pictures not of ourselves.. but guess of what??
the tiny silver fish that were all flopping on the ground of the jetty!!
will put up pictures soon
and it was v v funny cos this damn pro fisherman was just reeling in fish and leaving them lying on the floor to die in the sun.. and one flopped from his side of the jetty to our side ahah it flop damn far and we were trying to take a photo of it then it flopped so near to our feet..
flop a bit more will reach the water already.. but it lost the will to live.. and so it stopped flopping for a while and lay there gasping for breath
and then the fisherman didnt see what
and he also never count the fish whatt..
and the fish flop to our feet already whaaaaaat..
so i picked up the fish
and faith took a pic
of me and the fishy
then i flung it back into the sea!
ahaha then it was time to return the bikes so we returned it
and then!!
we went to the water's edge and walked in the water(!) along the shoreline
the water very cold!!
and we realised there were mini pretty seashells!!
so we started picking and lost track of time
and got a nice old lady to take a picture of our spectacular day!
then i got a cab home with a lovely driver who tried to rush me home in the shortest possible way but like at two traffic lights from my house there was this freaking big jam then he felt so guilty about it! haha then i kept saying nvm nvm its ok..
wah but in the end my cab fare frm east coast was 12freaking bucks.. which is even more than to bishan la..
then he wanted to discount for me but i thot he was too nice alr so i tried to pay him in full but i didnt have enough coins haha 10cents short then he told me to have a nice day and take care =)
SO MANY LOVELY PEOPLE TODAY!!!!!!
wah so happening we got frm west to town then frm town to east coast..
cant wait for faith to send me the pics
HAHA half way we had sudden realisations "EH TOMORROW GOT EXAM LEH."
"oh ya.."
then like a while later "let's go to the beach!!"
tomorrow is going to be damn fun also i bet.. =)
finish the paper at 9am la!
then gg to kbox for the first time! must go and drink honey and eat strepsils and mug lyrics today so tomorrow will be creme de la creme whooo
kk
wah sooooo fun =) haha 3 days straight of happy partying
bye!
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[March 23rd 2006] |
ahah Mr M.cconnell is online now..
just got an email pop up frm him
anyway..
it's 7.59am!
i woke up at 7am and lazed ard in bed listening to 98.7 then i just got up and switched on the comp.. havent brushed teeth hehe
going to meet faith later and go ICE-SKATING!!!!
aiya i think i'll be late looking at how slow i am now..
yesterday was quite a good day!!
after history we were all brain dead..
cos i think almost all of us stayed up till wee hours to study
then after the crazy 3hr paper we couldnt think anymore..
then they wanted to watch V for Vendetta
and i didnt want!! because i was complaining my brain not working already dont want some heavy duty movie that needs thinking i want some chick flick just sit down and laugh then feel damn good after that..
but then no good chickflick only got that dumb date movie which was the only movie closest to a comedy so in the end went for V for Vendetta..
and my friends...
IT'S DAMN FREAKING GOOD
omg..
like every part of it was sooo good
Remember, remember the Fifth of November
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot
I know of no reason why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot
yea after the movie i walked out feeling so Ding!Ding!
haha my brain kind of got revived for a while after that..
whoaa..
yea then we walked ard town for a while.. been quite some time since we had quite a big class thing outside.
ate then went ard looking for a.ngie's present for king
oo vertical horizon is playing now..
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
and you don't know why...
ok going to eat breakfast then change and meet faith.
oh wait first i must brush teeth.
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[March 22nd 2006] |
I AM HERE TO BREAK ELLY'S MONOPOLY OF THE BLOG. everybody cheer. anw yes yu know whats my stimulus? its her last blog entry. check this out "and lastly my brother will go to zit." YESS. and yu know that a stimulus has to be strong enough to create a threshold potential so that the Na+ voltage gated ion channels are opened. and elly's bro is definitely handsome enough for me to start blogging again. and for the uninitiated, my hardy handphone that has braved many falls has finally succumbed and burst a few pixels. so basically there's this big grey thing in the middle of my screen. hoho so elly thank you very much. even though your phone is a bit big, a bit old, a bit notsofamousbrand, i still appreciate the gesture. AIYA ok 2 papers down 2 more to go. wah maths ar. bloody volume proving question. i made a freaking mistake at every line VOMIT BLOOD. and the cosine rule i just kept going in circles. like a stationary wave. which is formed from the superposition of 2 progressive waves with equal frequency and wavelength but opposite directions so yu jus end up going nowhere. and its physics tmr my worst sub ever. i sincerely hope that my ionic product = ksp and remain saturated and nothing would precipitate out before the damn exam and hopefully all the formulas that i choose would be tycoly correct. and yu know how to rmb the current direction. if its going into the paper, it means that yu can see its butt and therefore it should be censored and so cross indicates current going into the paper. pangsai la i think i'm going mad. haha and kungpaokitty is modelling for loreal. but pple claim she's faking hoho. lore-al. like ethan-al. so its an aldehyde. so to detect whether its a carbonyl compound, yu can always use the DNPHdunnowhatsaiorange solution and to check if its a true aldehyde, yu can use fehling's solution. if a brick red copper compound precipitates, its a positive result. bnet games are really bloody fun omg. i went mad the other day and played for 4 hours. and thats not counting the 2 hours i've been chalking up daily during the hols. hehe everybody should try it seriously. jurassic park, island trolls, uther's league, murderer, microarena, etc. anw games are only fun when yu're supposed to be mugging for exams. damnit why ar. like last yr after promos, sims 2 became so slow and boring. and after o's, www.popcap.com games were like how cheesy. cheesy HAHA. elly's bubble boy who is very scared of elly. and bessie is hooked onto this fishing game on addictivegames.com. which i strongly advise yall not to go now. its just like the le chatalier's law. where the system (games) will shift (become funner) to overcome the change (yu mugging for once) so that equilibrium (FFFF) can be regained. wtf why am i cursing myself CHOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. really hope dun have to drop s.
when yu're not part of the solution, yu are the precipitate.
siao this entry is really kennyandchingfengzi. i am really tempted to delete it.
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[March 21st 2006] |
im still alive..
haha but wait for TOMORROW..
omg its history
and i really really really am dead for it
i cant bring myself to start
cos its so massive and painful
die liao..
but cheese was really freaking funny just now..
and i dunno why i had a delayed reaction on the way home in the train w benny then i started laughing and laughing like shit.. laugh until i cry omg..
cheese is the ultimate
its quite fun mugging w the class i realise..
not very productive
but atmosphere quite good
haha k
now i shall face my doom
bye
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